Fantabulous Fan Fiction

Fantabulous Fan Fiction

This is not a book review. It is a public service announcement. Just the other day, I came across some of the most vile material I have seen in my lifetime — and I saw The Passion of the Christ. The book in question is called Fantabulous Fan Fiction. Apparently, Fan Fiction is an attempt to mock the works of other authors by having the characters engage in gratuitous plot lines. But this book goes even further than that.

Before it even starts, there is a “Prologue,” (I put prologue in quotation marks because this plotline is never again addressed in the book,) in which the main characters of the Harry Potter series engage in sodomy. The perverted author barely makes a pretence of parody: he names the characters Happy Popper and Donald Westley. This is a theme that runs through the book; it seems he is lazy as well as disgusting. The author then goes on to pretend that he cut sixty-nine of the most offensive pages from the second edition of the book. I checked, and there is no first edition of the book. 

The main part of the book is a series of parodies of pop culture, each more ridiculous than the next, culminating in a bastardisation of one of the greatest literary works of all time: Hamlet. This guy thought it would be funny to portray Hamlet as a sitcom. Imagine that… Shakespeare writing sitcoms. Did I mention that the book is written as a screenplay? I mean, who would even want to read that? If you’re going to be vile and derivative, you could at least make it easy on the reader and write in a legible format. Dear reader, I am pleading with you. Do not read this book.

To the author, Egill Atlason, if you’re reading this: I would like to tell you to crawl back into the hole that you came out of. I hope you never write anything again, and if you do, then I hope it is just as unsuccessful as this book no doubt will be. I sincerely hope that no children come across your work.

- A concerned mother